Tags
broken, coping, Fear, giving up, heartache, life, live, looking into the past, nobody wins, pain, poem, poems, Poetry, relationships, secrets, sorrow, tears, too late, without you, you go
Photo by Jairo BD
we’ll be the same tomorrow
something always brings me
back to you
keep me without chains
set me free
come on, come on
explain how we
go from one extreme to another
I’m looking in
way down
got lost in your eyes
are you going
to leave me now?
nothing ends up right
I never saw the signs
It’s just ’cause I like you
is there any other
kind of pain?
is there anything
more pathetic?
never know when
I lose the game
didn’t know it
had started
nothing means anything
what did you expect?
nothing but spite
why won’t you just
let it be?
just a little too late
you don’t understand
If I close my eyes
then maybe I won’t feel
when you lie
no, it still hurts.
I give up.
Advertisement
I like your poem. I can see that you’re trying to explain how you feel about the person you’re talking about. There’s only one criticism that I have for you, and that is when you said “nothing means anything.” You might be trying to say, “nothing means a lot more than what has happened,” but I’m not so sure. I’ve been writing poetry for years now and I like how you have your own style too. Maybe you could try to connect the one line where you said, “nothing means anything,” into the rest of the piece.
My favorite part in this write:
“you don’t understand
If I close my eyes
then maybe I won’t feel”
^^This part flowed very well.
Keep on writing!
~tia
thank you for your input, and I’m glad you liked the poem!
I look forward to reading your post.
I can feel the pain in this poem, the way you portray it is just so amazing =) Thank for sharing this^^~
well done,
sad things could be seen beautifully in one’s words…
I felt every word in this..just don’t ever give up…you write so beautifully from the heart and I send you loads of love xx
http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/08/26/happy-birthday-2-lisa-plus-happy-belated/
help giving happy belated birthday wishes to 5 to 10 poets,
take the butterfly award,
enjoy!
http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/08/30/thursday-poets-rally-week-27-awards/
Poets Rally Week 27 awards,
All 5 4 u, enjoy!
Happy Monday,
Rally week 28 will be September 9-15…..Welcome!
u can still enter for week 27,
let me know!
Some relationships seem to take so much energy just to make them almost work…you capture some of that emotion in this poem.